Hey, y’all! I’m a full-time freelance writer with a background in newspapers. I’ve lived up and down the East Coast, USA, most recently in North Carolina, where I happened to have grown up. My wife Lina/Selina and I now live in her home country, the Netherlands. We moved there (to Eindhoven) in 2014 not having anything to do with politics or acceptance, but because it was her turn to live in her country. Fair enough! My professional website is at www.bydianedaniel.com. You can email me at firstname.lastname@example.org.
I started this blog late 2010, to write about the male-to-female transgender experience from a spouse’s perspective. In November of that year, my husband started living as Lina, the woman he had been all along. This happened after hormone therapy and some relatively minor facial surgery. “He” told me about “her” in late 2004, so I’d had a lot of time to process the news before the official transition day, Nov. 16, 2010. I didn’t write anything public leading up to that because we were terrified of people finding out before we were ready to share the news.
Surprisingly, after the transition, things settled down relatively quickly, as in about four months. I was certainly more comfortable processing my thoughts privately and with friends and our amazing therapist than processing here, in pubilc. (We’re doing so well that we don’t even see said therapist anymore, though she is certainly on call.)
But when I decided to write something for the Boston Globe, my last newspaper employer (love the Globe!), I returned to this blog so I could share with readers the resources I’ve been collecting for years, and perhaps even keep the conversation going. (If you didn’t land here via my Globe piece, it will fill in the gaps.)
One final thing. Writing publicly about our transgender household is terrifying on many levels. Overwhelming really. But important. When I learned about Lina, the first thing I did was look for articles and books on the topic. I found a few (see my Resources heading). They saved me. We need more, so I’m adding to the collection. I invite everyone who feels they can be more visible to do so. It matters. And thank you for visiting!